Bootes and Hattie (sung to “Changes” by David Bowie)

Still don't know what you were, sniffing for

And your time was running short, you had to make a poop and,

Every time you thought you, found a spot

It seemed the spot was, not so sweet

So you kept on, sniffing,

You were searching for that, much-used stain,

There on the rug you chose to squat, ‘cause,

It’s much too late to, stop that train

B-B-B-Bootes and Hattie!

(Turn and face your Mom)

Or your Daddy

(Don't want to have to ask again)

B-B-B-Bootes and Hattie

(Turn and face your Mom)

Or your Daddy

(Just gonna have to find a different spot)

Poop may need be

But you can't poop there 

I sense the ripples, move your bowels,

Don’t do it, on the rug, too hard to clean it up and,

Though the poops float through your guts,

And still the cramps are getting worse,

But these carpets, that you shit on

As we, try to keep them clean,

Are not immune to your, smelly movements,

They're quite aware that poop is,  coming soon

B-B-B-Bootes and Hattie!

(Turn and face your Dad)

Or your Mommy

(Don't want to have to, ask again)

B-B-B-Bootes and Hattie

(Turn and face your Dad)

Or your Mommy

(Just gonna have to find a, different spot)

Poop may need be,

But you can't poop there 

Strong need, of pooping, is cramping you

Poops, are a-coming,

the place you’re not suppose to

B-B-B-Bootes and Hattie!

(Turn and face your Mom)

Or your Daddy

(Don't want to have to, ask again)

B-B-B-Bootes and Hattie

(Turn and face your Dad)

Or your Mommy 

(Just gonna have to find a, different spot)

Poop may need be,

But you can't poop there

I said that poop may need be,

But you can't poop there

-sax outro-